Friday, 21 October 2011

fuck off peter andre

If you're asking yourself who the fuck is he . . .  well then you know how I feel.

He was a 'pop' star who had ten (s)hit singles at the end of the eighties, mostly based upon him showing his abs in the videos and trying to be black, when in fact he's actually of Greek origin.
Then sadly fortunately he faded into obscurity.

You are not black and those are not dreadlocks,
and getting punched in the face does not give you an afro nose, but I'm prepared to try.

That is until, in an effort to revive himself he appeared in "I'm a celebrity get me out of here" and met the self promoting tart glamour model Jordan aka Katie Price.
To be fair to KP she kind of won the public over and changed peoples perception of herself on the show, but her and PA began a relationship that ended up with them having two kids and getting married.
Then a very public divorce.

At which point the greasy loser Peter should of done the world a favour and faded back into the obscurity where he belongs.

But no.
He keeps making these fucking awful reality shows about his brilliant life (insert sarcasm) for ITV2. I've never watched any of them but I see them advertised EVERY FUCKING AD BREAK on all the ITV channels. I'm starting to think ITV2 should rename itself the Peter Andre channel as there seem to be so many.
No sooner does one finish then they are advertising the next.
And as far as I can tell they all follow the same formula.
Cameras follow him around all the fucking time.
With special emphasis on any and every time a fan (ITV2 employee) approaches him, he makes an appearance at the opening of some corner shop, performs in yet another charity concert (he's the real fucking charity case), has a day out with his kids, buys yet another sports car (penis extension) or goes to the toilet, just so we get that he's. . . you know. . .famous.

There's an expression about having too much of a good thing.
He's not even a good thing, and yet there is WAY too much of him on the TV.

KP has made a few reality shows, even before she met him. But people were interested in her car crash life, whereas most people had forgot who he was until he got with her. And apparently she is not happy with him because she decided that she no longer wanted to feature their children in her shows but he continues to use them to get public support in his. Even if you don't like her (I don't) she deserves some credit for her business acumen, her only asset is her huge fake tits herself, but through self promotion she is worth millions.
His only asset was her.

In the last few days I've also seen adverts for a couple of new chat/ interview shows coming on the TV soon and every one of them has guess who amongst their planned guests.
Peter fucking Andre.

Get the fuck off my telly you greasy squeaky voiced cunt.

He's almost as annoying as the French.


  1. Oh. So he's much like Kim Kardashian is here in the US, except he's accomplished infinitely more.

  2. He is exactly like the fucking assholes on Jersey Shore....everywhere you look, and absolutely worthless.

  3. Come DCG, sing it with my:
    "OOOOH WOOOOAH OOOOH WOOOOH, mysterious girrl, I wanna get next to you..."

    Yeah, I know. I'll say it before you do, "Fuck off Lily!"

  4. I don't think this is particularly fair. I'm not a huge Peter Andre fan but he seems a nice guy and he's a million times better than scummy Jordan could ever be! I hate all fame seekers regardless so maybe this is fair, it certainly is slightly in line with my views.

  5. I don't think anything can be as annoying as the frogs. But I share your dislike for this twat. I can't really stand his ex-wife either, and having not seen I'm A Celebrity (God willing I never shall see it) my opinion of him and his ex are what they always were. I never really had one of him, but to me she isn't much beyond a dumb attention seeker who got famous for having a pair of huge, fake, tits. Sometimes I wish my TV didn't get ITV2, but even then we'll still have him shoved down our throats thanks to the other ITV channels. At least he isn't on any other shows. And at least she isn't pursuing a career in music anymore. My ears never did quite recover from their...rendition...of A Whole New World. Just thinking about it hurts my brain.

  6. @Maxwell, Kim who ??? Yeah, exactly.
    @Choleesa, Never seen that either - not gonna bother.
    @Lily, You said it for me :)
    @Yeamie, To people who know him he might be, but that does not mean I want to see him every time I turn the telly on. And if he puts himself in my line of vision I will have an opinion.
    @Mark, LOL very true - but she still might have another go. And read it again - he is about to appear on a few other shows...soon no TV will be safe.

  7. Yup! Sounds like a Jersey Shore type!

  8. I'm glad I don't really watch TV then lol.

  9. I hate reality shows. Though I admit I watched the Osborne's.... but enough already. Especially with "celebrities" we only know from these fucking shows. Jersey Shore.... fuck all my friends are obsessed. When they ask my opinion of something on their show I tell them if I ever have an opinion on that show, I'll need a bullet in the head to put me out of my misery.

  10. I never heard of the guy and I'm proud of that! He seems like a real douche-bag!

  11. The Oxford Union invited Katie to give a lecture, so maybe they should ask him as well. I'm sure he has some interesting views on whether men should use make-up.

  12. Hahaha...He is a fucking dickhead! He makes me want to punch him in the face too!
    I went to a hen weekend at butlins once and there was some 80's revival thing... Kenny Thomas, Rick astley... then, Peter fucking Andre turned up on stage!! Why oh why did they let that happen? Was he even born then? He got booed off stage... Haha!

  13. I can honestly say I fucking hate the both of them.


    I hate them almost as much as Paris Hilton and Kerry Katona. And that really is saying something.

    I do think his two kids are really cute though, so at least he has that going for him.

  14. I have no idea who he is.

    Ah, the bliss of living in China.

  15. Strange.
    Is he the "other half" of the infamous Milli Vanilli?
    Well he's does smell like a premium douchebag!

  16. He should marry Kerry Katona, that would reduce the number of shit TV programmes straight off.

    I really don't get the popularity of no-marks and has-beens. Do people really want to be like them?

  17. @Eva, In that case don't watch it.
    @Jamie, I think the Osbornes was a bit different to most though.
    @dan, He is !
    @GB, That would've been interesting - most of the time she's too busy sucking her teeth to string a sentence together.
    @MissT, I would've let him stay on and thrown things at him.
    @WW, Agreed, but with them two as parents they'll need their looks 'cos there aint no brains to inherit.
    @Lemons, Lucky you - makes me want to move to China.
    @Arlequin, I'm sure I heard that they had already had a fling. Me neither, people who are 'famous' for no reason get on my nerves.

  18. I must admit, I am completely unfamiliar with AP (& KP, for that matter) , however you make him sound amazzzzing. Curosity mighta killed the cat but it's sending me to youtube.

  19. It's odd that nobody in the US has heard of Peter and Katy... didn't they go to live there for a series or something? Obviously they made a massive impact lol.

  20. lmao!! he's never been seen by my eyes before. i did say, who? but i thought i was missing something ... now ... with your lovely description of him, i know i'm not missing anything.

  21. This post is hilarious although I have no idea who these people are. I want to be a dirty cowgirl too so I shall follow you. Thank you for your opinion on my poem. I hope you'll follow me too. Or maybe you already are.


  22. @Arlequin, I think you're right - probably in yet another vain effort to be the Beckhams.
    @Andrea, No you're not and I'm sorry for introducing you and my other friends across the pond to him.
    @Lola, Welcome to my blob - and yeah I am :) You had me at pissfuckcuntshit.

  23. The geezer is as irritating as the X factor !

    The fact he is meant to be a good dad does not stop him form being a cunt !

  24. I hate reality tv SO MUCH. Except for those shows that I like. The rest are crap.


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