easter bunny

Normal service appears to have returned to England.

Our garages have fuel, the long queues are gone and in keeping with a typical British bank holiday weekend the weather has taken a turn for the worse. Parts of the country that were baking in sunshine last week are now covered in snow, thankfully I live in the South and we never get the worst weather but I am back to wearing Uggs on my feet that have tan lines from last week.
Very bizarre.
Global warming ? Global freezing more like.
Easter weekend is always a wash out though, it's as traditional as the delays that will no doubt plague all our airports, and the hoards of screaming brats happy smiling children that suddenly appear everywhere.
Not that it bothers me, as I have four days off work I plan to sleep. A lot. And hang wallpaper. And catch up on reading some blogs, I have not done that for ages so apologies if you are missing my inane drivel pearls of wisdom left in your comments.
And hopefully someone will buy me a HUGE chocolate egg.
Son has a new job, so hopefully if I post this picture on his facebook he might just take the hint.

I love Green & Blacks. . . does anybody want to send me some ? Please.

I might not be into Christianity but I am more then happy to indulge in any eating associated with it's various festivals. I'll even accept Christmas pudding if anyone's got any leftovers lying around in their cupboards ? That is probably the only thing I missed by spending last years Xmas laying on a beach, I did buy one that I planned to eat when I got back but the greedy wombfruit had scoffed the lot.

I was thinking about the Easter story today, as my friends kid was talking about stuff he had done at school, and there's a fair bit about it that really doesn't make sense to me. I suppose I am what some people might call spiritual, I believe in an afterlife (I've had my share of spooky encounters), reincarnation, karma and destiny, but I don't believe in God. I think that Jesus was an actual man who walked on Earth, but the stories about his life that are in the bible sound to me like he was some kind of Shaman or spiritual healer. And just like any story that gets written on a blog passed down through the generations it's been exaggerated and embellished.

I don't think he was the son of "God".

I think that all came about because people always want a rational explanation for anything they don't understand.

According to the story God sent his only son to earth in order to sacrifice him.

Hmmm.

I'm a parent and if anyone tried to harm my son I would tear their fucking head off. And I'm just an ordinary (well ok maybe I'm a bit strange) woman, but if I was some amazing all-seeing omnipotent mistress of the universe and someone tried to hurt him ?

Yeah I think there'd be thunderbolts and lightening alright.

But no, apparently he allowed his only child to be sacrificed. Did they not have Social Services in those days ? If you said you were going to sacrifice your kid today they'd be taken into care.

Hardly the actions of a kindly benevolent normal parent.

Religious men advocating child abuse ?

I thought he was supposed to be Jewish not Catholic.

But anyway, apparently after this happened the crucified Jesus was put in a cave and a few days later he rose from the dead.

Since Christians aren't supposed to believe in reincarnation that can only mean one thing.

Jesus was a Zombie.

And it seems that I am not the only one to think so. This thought occurred to me earlier and when I googled "zombie Jesus" looking for pictures (try it, you'll see) for this post there is just loads of stuff about it on the net. And if it's on the Internet that must mean loads of people are brainwashed idiots believe it and if loads of people believe something then it must be true.

Isn't that how religions are started.

And political parties.

Dave's at it again too. His latest idea is all about allowing - well I'm not entirely sure who, but the police for one I guess - powers to read everyone's Internet communications. This is supposed to be about our national security and catching paedophiles, but then in today's world climate terrorism and child molesters are two issues that are guaranteed to get everyone riled up. So tell the public that's why you're doing it and they'll all agree it's a good idea.

Yeah, I'm not buying it.

Big Brother is watching you.

And Dave just wants to be able to hack into my msn and look at the pictures, and he's probably wondering if Obama and his new mate Sarkozy are talking behind his back.

Personally I think that the Internet has meant that a lot more perverts are caught then ever were before, they have always been there, but before the web and the way that enabled them to communicate and share filth it was all far harder to detect. In my opinion technology has made them easier to catch, find one with a computer and you find all his contacts too. How many times now do we hear of people being convicted based upon evidence that was found on their computers. And I'm damn sure MI5 have the same powers when it comes to finding terrorists.

So whatever Dave might say this new idea is really not going to make much difference there.

Is he planning to spend his days reading everyones emails now ?

Maybe he's going to be inspecting blogs as well. Good. He might finally find the letters I wrote to him and see sense.

Mind you, I will probably be far too busy and exhausted to help him run the country once my latest ebay find arrives. . . 

Nobody told me you could get Diesel powered injectors for your Vag.

Bit concerned about the shape of the thing but gotta be worth a try, even if the compatibility information isn't available. I'll let you know.

Rabbit ? This is my Easter Bunny.

I'm off to the garage, I need to stock up on Diesel just in case there's another shortage.

Happy Easter !

Watch out for the Zombies.