Sunday, 15 December 2013

my TV is full of idiots

And I don't even watch it THAT much.

When I was a little kid I honestly believed that there were little people in the back of it.


One day my was Dad taking the back off of it as it had stopped working for some reason, he told me to stay out of the way for safety reasons, but I was being such a persistant nuisance he let me have a look at what he was doing.
I still remember the look on his face when he asked me why I was crying and I told him the little people must be dead.

But I must of been about 4 at the time.
So a reasonable excuse for that mistake.
Not that todays children would be so naive about technology, my friends three year old can make my phone do things I had no idea it could.

But anyway that's off topic really, back to the idiots on the TV.

As much as I may or may not watch it in the evening at home, I would never choose to watch it during the day. For one thing I have so little free day time that I have a lot of far better things to do when I do get some, but also because during the day is when the idiots seem to be on in droves.

Daytime TV in this country consists of fight chat shows full of the dregs of society discussing doubtful parentage of their assorted ugly children, failed relationships and substance misuse issues, DIY shows, ripped off consumers and cowboy builders.
But often when I am at work (as a support worker I am in someone elses home) the TV is on.

At lunchtime on Monday Loose Women was on. Which is basically a bunch of middle aged TV has-beens (apart from Janet Street Porter, I love her, she's opinionated, often rude and pulls no punches) talking about whatever is topical that day.

On Monday they were, of course, talking about Nelson Mandela.
As was everyone.
But unlike the Loose Bimbos most people managed to get the facts right.
One of them was talking about the personal tragedys he had suffered and said "he lost his Son in a car accident". No, he didn't, that was his great granddaughter, his Son died from AIDs.
I actually found that rather offensive, that they did not even bother to check the (very well known) facts.
Then another of them was saying how he always managed to keep his sense of humour and how you could tell that because no matter who he was meeting or where he always wore "those loud bright shirts".
Yeah, those shirts are made from traditional tribal African fabrics.
He didn't wear them to be funny, he wore them as a sign that he remained true to his tribal roots.

Idiots.

Shame Ms Street Porter wasn't on the show that day, because I have a feeling that she might've picked them up on those points.


Friday, 6 December 2013

once upon a time . . .

. . . there was a bored, middle aged, sarcastic, insomniac woman with far too much time on her hands.

This woman was well known amongst her friends for having a bit too much to say for herself and a habit of saying it at all the wrong times, and she wasn't in the habit of giving a fuck if anyone got offended either.

And then she discovered the internet and the art of trolling, and passed many a happy hour upsetting, offending and generally annoying anyone stupid enough to add her as a "friend" on Facebook, abusing men on dating sites, and looking at pictures of kittens.

One night she saw a comment to a post on B3TA which mentioned a blog written by someone whose father was a victim of a serial killer and went to have a look. This was a revelation to her, not just for it's content (which was/is something pretty fucking special, and which she read from first post to last) but because there was a moment of :



If anyone can have a blog so the fuck can I !

And the rest is history.

History being the operative word here of late, I keep meaning to revitalise it, but never get properly round to it.
Until a few weeks ago, when it became apparent that it's about time I wrote another letter to Dave aka the idiot that runs this country (into the ground).

I started the post...and never finished it, but saw him say something on the TV a couple of days ago that got me riled up again.
So then. . . .

Dear Dave,

What the fuck are you thinking by agreeing to the building of a new Nuclear power plant here ?

I thought we were supposed to be investing in green energy resources and concerned with the future of the planet ?

Clearly not.

And to add insult to injury we were given this news in the same week that three of our energy companies announced price rises for consumers. Your advice to those who will struggle with this was to shop around providers as there are apparently some better deals out there. Presumably you mean EDF - this being the very same company that are going to be building the new blot on our landscape.

(I'm not entirely sure it's a coincidence that they are one vowel away from being a racist organisation).

And not even a British company at that. Oh no, these fuckers are French.
So no doubt the same company that are responsible for Frances 50+ plants, the majority of which are sat on their North Coast, so if they go Chernobyl the fallouts heading our way. And now they're actually putting one up here.
Fuck right off.

Some twat on the news actually said "nuclear energy is relatively safe".
Relative to what ? Anthrax ? Semtex ? Armageddon ?



Did you learn nothing from Fukushima ? If the world only learnt one lesson from that it should've been that when you have Nuclear plants you don't even need human error or someone to push the proverbial button for a major disaster to happen. And the effects of what happened there are going to have repercussions for the planet for a long time to come. We are still facing the possibility of further meltdowns, it's kept out of our news but the "clean up" operation is only just beginning.
Not that that shits ever going to be truly clean.


And then...
I knew you were an idiot but really ?

Two days ago I saw you on the lunchtime news trying to defend the utter cock up your governments making of the economy, and talking about the budget announcements that were due to be made that evening.
And in relation to the present state of affairs you said....

"When someone's ill you don't take their temperature every day do you?"

What the fuck ? NO, when someone's ill you take it several times a day. It really does worry me that the man supposed to be running this country can't even get an analogy right.

Time you had a lightbulb moment Dave ? No, it's a bit too late for that.


Sort it the fuck out,
DCG.


Thursday, 18 April 2013

and still it goes on


Any of you readers who've been with me for a while might remember that I am not Facebooks biggest fan, or at least not of the moronic variety of users it seem to attract in droves.



Of course there have been times in the past when I have used them to write posts for your amusement but since I deleted my account for a while, then deleted them when I re-instated it, I no longer have to witness the endless drivel from Thick Bird and her kind.

FYI she knows I'm back on it and has sent me a few friend requests when she's seen me on our mutual friends page. I know I could block her but it's much more satisfying not to - and have her wondering why I don't accept.

So anyway, now I just use it for the people I want to stalk keep in touch with, and have no need to log in and see things in my news feed that make me want to punch and/or delete people.

That is until today when I saw this :


You're fucking kidding me ?
You actually made a Facebook event out of your mothers funeral ?

Surely if there is only one occasion you should invite people to in person it's a funeral, but even then it's not really the done thing to "invite" anyone, aren't you just supposed to make an announcement ?

Sadly in the last few months a couple of people I know (although not that well) have passed away, in both instances details of the funeral were posted on their pages, but it was just that - a post - letting people know when. And both of these guys were well known people who were an integral part of the local music scene, so there were a lot of people wanting to attend who the respective families would not have known to personally invite.

So I'm left wondering a few things about this :

Where is my invite ? Since it is actually set as a "public" event.
If I get one should I RSVP in person or on the event page ?
Or as it's public can I - or just anyone - turn up ?
Or will there be tickets ? Or is it free entry ?
Is there a dress code ?
Or a free bar ?
Or a bar at all ?

Please tell me it's not just me who finds this all kinds of wrong.

Some things are meant to be private aren't they ? And the death of a loved one must surely fall into that category. One of the good things about Facebook is the way it lets you keep in touch with people, it's the main reason I'm still there, for those friends and family I otherwise might not speak to for months, but there is such a thing as a private message.
Or at least make your "event" private.
When my Mum died I received so many PRIVATE messages offering support, four years on I've still kept some of them, but I would not of welcomed anything about such a very personal issue posted where anyone could see it, especially now that the privacy options seem to have become rather slack.

Some people really should not be allowed to use the internet.



On a lighter note, imagine if a cat was to breed with a bat . . .


Cute ?
But what if a bat was to breed with a panda . . .


Apparently that is a previously unknown breed of bat recently discovered in the Sudan. I love bats, one of the places I've lived in had some in the loft and I used to really like listening to them at night.
A lot of people tell me that would freak them right out.
So I guess that makes me a bit odd.

Who knew ?




Monday, 15 April 2013

sometimes you just gotta dive in. . .


. . . even if you really don't know where you're heading.



I have now got a grand total of five posts that I have started and run out of steam with.

But - here's the thing  - I really do want to start writing here again on a regular basis, I guess I just need to get back in the habit.
Like just doing what I used to do, moan about stuff that pisses me off and write about things that happen in the course of my lazy extremely busy life.

(And do far too much of that stupid ironic clever ridiculous thing where you write something then cross it out in the vague hope that because other people find it funny).

So. . .

I finished work early today and went into the town centre to run a few errands, then decided I deserved a treat from Burger King. As I'm sat there stuffing my face I can see a homeless man sat in a doorway opposite. He just looked so dejected, he had his head down most of the time, like he'd given up even trying to beg.
After I'd finished my food I bought a takeaway and a coffee and went and gave it to him.
As the guy looked up and smiled at me he actually looked like he might cry.

I didn't do it for the karma, I did it because I figured he would be hungry, it was cold, and he looked like he needed someone to at least SEE him.

But. . .



I walked on a bit further, but I had a few shopping bags that were getting awkward to carry so I stopped to sort them out. Whilst I'm doing this a couple walked past me, having come from the direction where the homeless guy was sat.
As they passed me I heard the fella say . . . "sat there begging but he can afford a Burger King".

Idiot.

I nearly said something.
But I didn't.
Even homeless people got to eat. But I suppose he's probably one of those twats who think the only reason people beg is to buy heroin and vodka.



Also, I am getting very pissed off at all the fiasco over Maggie Thatcher.
Mostly the cost of the funeral, at the same time as various benefit cuts are being introduced. This country is going down the financial pan pretty fucking past. I know there are other countries far worse off then us, but it seems to me that the priorities are wrong here.



Last week I watched an article on the news about the benefit cuts, there was an interview with a single mother who was crying because she was worried about becoming homeless. She said she couldn't even afford to take her son swimming.
Then five minutes later on the same programme they announce that the queen is to be given extra money from the civil list (ie tax payers money) to cover the cost of her "royal duties". How does someone who is among the worlds richest people and who owns several very large houses get to be entitled to more of our hard earned taxes when some of her "subjects" are living in cardboard boxes ? Or in fear that they might end up doing that ?

And just what exactly are those "royal duties". Holidays to far flung places to shake hands with dictators, terrorists and despots no doubt.



I don't like paying tax. It hurts when I look at my wage slip and see what I actually earnt compared to what I actually get in the bank. But there was a time when I was a single mother with a young child and I am very fucking grateful that I live in a county where our rent was taken care of and where healthcare is free. And I know that other peoples taxes paid for that so I can't really complain too loudly if mine are now doing that for someone else.

However I do object to funding Liz's lifestyle.
Or Maggies funeral.

Guess this means I'm well and truly back :)

Thursday, 4 April 2013

blogging to the (wank) bank


First, a quick thanks to all of you who commented on the last post, I will be back properly soon - working on a couple of posts already.

(Yeah, still like to fail at doing do four things at once)

But I need to write this post in the meantime.

Logged in to reply to the comments and decided to check my stats, saw a lot of referrals from the same URL so went for a look and it's a blogger blog but trying to drum up business for a scam.

What concerns me is that it has a gadget with four other blogs, including this one, under the heading "Other Blogs I Like".
So, in case you are reading this having come from there I would like to say that I am in NO way connected to that blog or it's author, they are obviously using that gadget to try and make the (crappy, basic template, one post) blog appear credible, and bad luck for me that they have obviously stumbled across mine and decided to use it.

Of course good news for me if it brings a few genuine readers over and tough shit for their stupid plan when you read the next bit . . .

I did some research.

As I said, it's a scam, run by a fairly notorious individual by the name of Rob Benwell.
Here are some links which a) show that this person and his dastardly plan have been around a good few years and b) he's a professional alright - at scamming.

http://www.eagleresearchassociates.org/BankBlogging.php
http://scam.com/showthread.php?t=23216
http://www.lostballinhighweeds.com/blogging-to-the-bank-2010-review-no-really-its-a-real-review/

Incidentally I also found a few "positive" reviews, but it's quite apparent from their tone that they are also as fake as he is.

Be safe people.

And anyway if anyone should be a blogging millionaire it's me and I'm into my overdraft already and I only got paid four days ago. . . .


Monday, 1 April 2013

if I could just butt in for a moment.....

....lately I've been thinking that it's really time I did something about this blog.

Put it to bed forever, remove all the external links and write a final post.
Just in case people stumble across it and decide to follow hoping for new flashes of the brilliance they find here, I'd be pretty annoyed if I decided to look it up in 10 years time to find I had 873 followers.

Or I should actually start writing again on a reasonably regular basis, although I could still end this one and just start another.

Well clearly since here I am and this is not me saying farewell and thanks for all the fish I decided that I would go with the second option and make the effort.

So I logged into blogger for the first time in ages and what do I see ??

A dashboard full of posts about that fucking A-Z challenge.

This is how I felt about that last year (which was probably the last time I was here) but I've not changed my mind and am therefore going back into blog hibernation until it is safe to come back.

I'll be seeing you.....................