Tuesday, 10 May 2011

chocolate treats

I have just been reminded about this so in the interests of sharing . . . . . .

A while ago I was having another a rare lazy slobby day.
In my world that means not getting up all day til 4pm, eating chocolate healthy snacks and reading a book chatting to people on the laptop.
Amongst the delicacies I had indulged in was a big bag of Cadburys giant chocolate buttons.

I was wearing tracky bottoms and a vest-top with a built in bra. The top, although not indecent doesn't really contain the jamoonas so they get a bit squished in.
Not so much square pegs in a round hole more jelly in an egg cup - bound to be some spillage.

Imagine this, but longer
and with tits . . . nice.
I smoked my last cigarette then realised I also needed milk so tied my hair up, (if I don't comb it I look like a long haired Russell Brand Indian Princess - takes me half an hour to brush it so why bother just for that ?) stuck a pair of Uggs and a hoody on, grabbed my purse and keys and without going anywhere near a mirror went to the shop, which is literally at the top of my road.

Very convenient but does mean that most of the people that work there kind of know me - I'm in that shop most days and two of the staff live on my street.


I did notice a few people giving me odd looks in the shop, but I just gave em filthy looks smiled sweetly back.
Ok I had hair that looked like I'd literally been dragged though a tree bush and most likely looked like I was wearing my PJs at 4pm but I don't fucking care.
I don't pay a lot of attention to my appearance at the best of times (unless I'm getting lucky), never mind if I'm just making a trip up the shop so why the fuck should anyone else.
Well clearly not.

I walk back, passed one of the few neighbors that tolerates me I like and stopped to say hello then came indoors. Got a coffee then went back up to my bedroom, went to take the hoody off and realised that the zip had come half undone, looked at myself in the mirror and in my cleavage was a melted chocolate button.

These + warm cleavage = ew !!
It looked like shit.
Literally.



I was 'inspired' to write this ( well reminded of the faux pas) by a post I read on Gratuitous Violets blog, check her out  - she's a new find for me and totally hilarious.


8 comments:

  1. The space between your boobs must be warm - you could put that information in your blogger profile.

    ReplyDelete
  2. you made me lol then drool black saliva down my cleavage I'm sat eating thorntons liquorice toffee you know how the toffee goes really soft after a few chews? well it falls out of your mouth very easily when you lol, no worries though the DOG likes it to HaHaHa, SHOWER !

    ReplyDelete
  3. OK, the Cadbury diary milk that I was coincidentally eating, just shot out of my mouth at that last part.
    Very funny!

    ReplyDelete
  4. chocolate+cleavage=happiness...
    who doesn't love them together and separate? i am a fan of all three.
    may i suggest going back to the same shop, but on each visit, you harbor a new snacky morsel in the midst?
    suggestions:
    ~tiny pretzels
    ~huge pretzel rod
    ~cheese sauce
    ~a beenie baby -not edible, but cute enough to bite...
    ~a slice of tomato

    the sky is the limit

    now i'm reminded of a story about food in my pants. jeeeeess- this crap's catchy.

    help help im a blogophile!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Holy crap ! Are those your tits in that picture ?

    ReplyDelete
  6. @GB - Do you think it would get me more followers ?

    @kiki & lily - haha, I sense a theme

    @Violet - I like that idea, I may progress to a cabbage.

    @anon - yes ! I especially like the way the reflection from my mates top makes them look like they have been sprayed with something.

    ReplyDelete
  7. go cabbage!!! maybe a purple cabbage leaf bra peering out from your hoodie...
    love it!

    more @ food and fashion fails:
    http://gratuitousviolet.blogspot.com/2011/05/wm4-or-how-did-that-get-in-there.html

    i reallly should not leave the house.
    like- ever

    ReplyDelete
  8. "Excuse me, maam. You've got some...um...uh, right in...never mind."

    ReplyDelete

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