it's all lies

Who the fuck thought up the term Global Warming ?

As a teenager I went through a punk militant phase.

I belonged to the Anti-Nazi League, went on marches against Apartheid, bought Living Marxism magazine, wore a ‘Troops Out’ T-shirt, took food parcels to the women protesting the US Missiles at Greenham Common and joined CND and Greenpeace.

And all whilst wearing Dr Marten boots and dirty hair.

I went to rallys and talks that were relevant to my new found sense of injustice and amongst these were many speakers on the subject of global warming and the state of the planet.

The people giving these talks and TV programmes I watched about it made it sound as if these were issues that were going to affect the planet in many years time.

Not likely to affect me but maybe my grandchildren or great grandchildren.

What grandchildren ? Yeah, I think Son needs to pull the proverbial finger out on that one.



Doesn't England look fab ?

It always sounded far in the future, I suppose they thought it would be.

But as is evident from the sometimes freakish and out of place weather conditions that are becoming all the more prevalent it seems that in fact these changes are occurring now.

There’s a part of me that finds this kind of exciting.
That things I thought would happen after I was long gone are occurring now.

My case is packed...beam me up !

Maybe I shouldn’t give up entirely on my plans for space travel and a transporter room in the spare bedroom just yet.

I wanted this....



However I am also a bit disappointed. Global WARMING ?…..my fucking arse.

I thought the implication of that meant I would get to see out my days living in a tropical country without the hassle of emigrating or having to put the cats through quarantine. And that rising sea levels meant I’d end up in a seaside apartment.

If it meant England was gonna get Caribbean temperatures then chop down all the trees I say.



I got this.....



But no, Global fucking freezing more like.

Whoever thought that name up is a fucking lying bastard.